it seems to have been a lot longer since my last post than a month-and-a-bit. december was so full-on i can’t even think of it without getting a bit of a headache. january so far has been spent trying to catch up with myself from december.
last night i had the unalloyed pleasure of having bek and georgia over. i haven’t caught up with either of these two for months and months, so it was just great to lie around, listening to music (norah jones, joni mitchell, chet baker, ricki lee jones, jeff buckley, tori amos…it was that kind of a night), drinking red wine, eating rich food, laughing and talking. makes me realise how much i’d missed it.
i hadn’t made any new year’s resolutions because i never do, so when the girls asked me what mine were i had to think for a minute. i decided that my resolution would be “to let go”. there are things i have no control over, all i can control is my response. so i’m going to try to let go. which is actually very very very hard to do.
the other thing is writing. georgia said “what is your goal with writing this year?”
“to finish a short story,” i said, hiding my face in the curtains.
“what, writing or publishing?”
that elicited a further groan from me. we decided upon publishing. surely it can’t be that hard, surely my creative reserves have replenished at least a little bit? surely in the intervening months since i’ve written anything there has been enough grist for the mill and enough angst to get me going again?